I feel regret every time I bring home a living creature.. both cats, my gecko, and even fish for my tanks. Advice on this forum is absolutely not a substitute for professional advice from a certified behaviorist, trainer, lawyer, or medical professional. My brother adopted a senior dog yesterday!!! Vent. Has anyone else felt like this? Apply for Care Credit, a credit line specifically for medical needs. vixta. Not saying this is a solution, just that over time dogs will mature and things will get better! When I first brought my dog home, I was so stressed because he seemed to have separation anxiety issues. [–]chow0789 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). It will take time for him to learn your ways and adjust. It will take time for you, too. ... help Reddit App Reddit coins Reddit premium Reddit gifts. Then today I took him to a trainer/boarding place. I dont want to bring him back, isnt that too harsh? She owns 3 dogs of her own. He is dependent on me and me alone. This reminds me of my situation. What a gentleman! Don't worry yet about going to dog parks - it might be overwhelming for him since you don't know his past history - and spend the next two or three weeks putting him on a rigid schedule, establishing the rules, building trust, and feeding him delicious treats to really solidify that trust between you guys. I dont even think thats an option. It's not a "love at first sight" type of thing. I recently (last week friday) adopted my first dog. Did I make a mistake? Carpet torn up. Youre right. For example, "[RIP] Speckles, Mixed breed, 17". These feelings are totally eclipsed by the joy and contentedness that my dog brings me, but they still happen occasionally. In short order you know if that dog you fell in love with online is a good match for you. Their lives are hectic with jobs and kids. "Adopters Regret" is completely normal! [Survey], [Meta], and [Update] are usable when appropriate. Nope. I went home for lunch.. and join one of thousands of communities. Today was an amazing day. My dog recently was passed away at only two and a half, but I felt good knowing I spent all the time that I could, with him. So its a hit or miss if he likes other dogs. The situation and feelings you are describing remind me of myself when we got our puppy with my S.O. Get him a tune-up: Schedule a first visit to your dog’s new veterinarian during the first week (or immediately upon adoption if you have other pets at home or suspect your new pup might be ill). I watched some youtube videos and saw how dogs do it. Like. AD. It's adoption blues, if you keep up trying to bond with your dog and keep making efforts it WILL pass! Totally normal. give it a month, and I swear to you, you will feel better by then. When possible, give information such as height at the shoulder, weight, age, region of origin, and behavioral traits. And right now I havent exposed him enough. When I got my pup, the first entire week I kept thinking I need to return him to the breeder how am I going to do this? And guess what!??!?! I'm just.. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. At first it seems like every unexpected thing is a huge, insurmountable problem. Or really- chewing. adoption anxiety dog regret; T. Tikopia New Member. I just thought I'd chime in and say that I felt this way for upwards of a week or so after I adopted my little guy - didn't help that he was still recovering from luxating patella surgery at the time! some days are really hard. What if Im in over my head? WITH NO PROBLEMS!!! [Discussion] You socialise dogs for the dog park. Am I just finding out that I genuinely should not be a dog owner and should surrender him soon because I don't deserve a dog? I don’t even regret the dog with untreated Addison’s who had food aggression. It lifted my spirits hugely. I adopted my dog in October 2015 and while I fell in love with him immediately, I had some pretty intense feelings of regret for the first couple of months after bringing him home. He had destroyed his crate. I know its only been like four days but now I'm feeling anxious. Should I give him back? Babies; ... That movie is a high-level highlight reel of adoption and paints an unrealistic picture. Another group may be made up of a network of loving, but busy, foster families who volunteered to foster a dog because they heard the need was great. sometimes. [Fluff] – Stories, lighthearted discussion, or feel-good web page links. Just take a deep breath and keep moving forward. Two other couples were looking at adopting him. Then we carry on as if nothing had happened! hello there, Breathe. Remember: even though you don't have to go through housebreaking and other puppy issues, you'll still need to put in some training time with him because he's young. Considering a dog’s average lifespan, that could mean 10 percent of his life. I knew she was my dog right then and there, little Lilly, and as I was leaving I had the adoption forms in my hot little hands. destroyed/gotten out of his crate but only so far as to end up in the garage and then didn't even relieve himself in the garage. Fences are a bad example. I was overwhelmed. [–]throwaway4477880[S] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (2 children). Our mutt was like this when we got him, I couldn't walk through the garden for the first 2 months or so; all better now. She does boarding, training, doggy daycare. You'll be okay :) as everyone said, it'll take some time for crate training to work out, and for your new pup to adjust to his COMPLETELY NEW LIFE, but he will. I honestly thought I was reading a re-post. Even your family dogs had a transition period before they learned the rules, right? In my update I just added to my post, I didn't crate him today and he did great :] I think he will be getting used to the schedule now, too. Thank you for this lengthy reply. You can teach an old dog new tricks, but undoing behavior is harder.. I just got off the phone with a local trainer who is so lovely and nice. Adopt a dog: you won’t regret it. I wouldn't assume he is unfriendly with other dogs until proven otherwise. After the night walk, a nice glass of wine or craft beer will help. I Regret My Decision To Adopt, But Not For The Reasons You’d Think. And maybe it was but maybe my problems aren't so bad. [–]HungryMoblin 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children). To help build it, spend time with your dog. He's a two year old rescue and I knew it would be hard to break his habits or something but now Im worried. He xdid amazing! I think the reasons for my feelings mostly stemmed from how the cats were reacting (we have a timid cat) and I was feeling huge amounts of guilt for upsetting their lives. I have had 2 cats for about 5 years and always thought I wanted a dog. I kept coming back to him. I worry that I might not be as great of an owner as I thought myself to be. Some exceptions may be granted to posts with a PSA quality. Be good to yourself. But he never showed signs of hating his wire crate. But I started having the same feelings as you, and coming up with scenarios in my head/excuses for returning him; "Oh, I could claim he's become aggressive with one of our cats just to return him without shame". take a camera with you to take lots of pictures in the hospital. AD. Pictures are only allowed in approved, themed picture threads (such as Photo Friday). You'll start to adjust and so will he. Google "affordable vet care" or "low cost vet care" in your area. I know puppy classes where part of what made me over come my puppy blues. In a recent article in The New York Times, John Tierney discusses recent research indicating that animals may experience feelings of regret.One scientist quoted in the article defines regret as the recognition of a missed opportunity. Other french bulldog owners I've talked to said he'd even be fine just in his crate until he eventually is used to the home and can have more space to hang out. A senior dog may have age-related issues that could be either time-consuming (sight or hearing loss) or expensive.. Undesirable behaviors that have been picked throughout the dog's life may be harder to train him out of. Maybe he would be better off with those other families. I've got better relationships with friends dogs than I do with my own ATM. Oye, Im sorry its so cold where you're at. Yet from the moment we (being my parents and I) were confirming we were getting the dog and preparing to take him home, I felt this drop in my stomach that I was setting myself up for something I had no right doing. Check if your local humane society offers a low-cost clinic. Oh god blood everywhere. Despite all the tears and anxiety, I had a feeling I would get over buyer's remorse and really enjoy my dog and I have! I promise you're not alone. Abigail Scardelletti March 1, 2019 5:21 pm Owning a dog is has been one of the best experiences of my life. you CAN do this!! If possible, include information about your general location, otherwise responses will likely target the average US dog owner. vi. Your dog may be the same. A friend of mine owns a dog boarding / walking business about 45 minutes from my house. The nipping/biting is also normal, he simply hasn't learnt "the rules" (how old is he?). They all say this is normal feelings after getting a dog. But I think I'm having buyers remorse. I don’t even regret the dogs I only had a short time because I learned soooo much! Be constructive. You sound like a very responsible owner and you've got a good plan in place. Im lucky >.< Thanks for making me feel normal about crying about this haha. I cant take him back and quite frankly I dont want to but now Im just panicking. No accidents, no destruction, just confidence issues. A very very happy moment. hi! reddit.com. That special bond happens because you and your dog know each other well and enjoy each other's company. When in doubt, go to the vet. That is a better ratio than I have with humans. I thought I was ready for this. Intellectually I knew it was a big decision going in and definitely not one made lightly. I took a half day of work so we will see how it goes tomorrow. It could also be separation anxiety from being alone. Multiple tags are fine. I actually searched this topic and read a few posts but didn't find a lot so I wanted to make my own. Spend time one on one. When I walk ihim on the street and he doesnt chase cars I am thankful. The [Fluff] tag cannot be used to post ordinary dog pictures. Even when I was sitting on the couch, he would go chill in his crate or in the other room so I didnt think he had separation issues. "What breeds are right for me? It is SO up and down. We built that bond and now he is 2.5 years old and I couldn't imagine my life without him! He was just chillin, looked up at me and I took him out without a huge "hello Im home lots of hugs and kiss". For us, we do not regret for one second either of our adoption journeys, because we have two amazing children who came the journeys. Who knows. We adopted a black lab mix just under a month ago, and he is the best boy. "Adopters regret". Message the moderators if you suspect a troll. I found a dog I really liked. I dont know.. Maybe it was the voodoo spell I put on her? Cats are so easy, you can leave them for a weekend, even longer, with extended feeders. Like speaking to the adoption people at the shelter and assuring them this is what I wanted and he was the dog for me. Our second, more timid cat (Felicity) has since come around to having him in the house as well, and is starting to return to her usual routine. Adoption records were not sealed to protect b-families or adoptees from upset or intrusion. Users are more likely to accept criticism when it is delivered with understanding and compassion. Maybe its my fault for not leaving him as much as I should have those first three days over the weekend. It will be okay, I promise. However, if you take the leap to adopt, I can all but guarantee it will not end in regret. That, plus enough exercise and just spending time together will all help him build a routine and settle in. Just to put things in perspective, here are some things various friends and neighbors' dogs have done: destroyed a $5,000 sofa by chewing & tearing apart the cushions, chewed up brand new baseboards in the rental apartment, barked all day in the apartment while the owner was out, ate an entire dark chocolate cake before anyone noticed, killed a Maltese at a dog park (this was a rescued greyhound; the hound owner wasn't educated enough to know about this danger). (self.dogs), submitted 5 years ago * by throwaway4477880. Aactually met with a trainer today at her home and we were there for an hour and a half! This is totally normal and you're going to be fine! and "What breeds are right for me? [–]misswestwoodOlive - Dalmatian mix + Tom - Toller 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child). I just don't think I was ready for what having a dog would entail. Slight nipping near hands but no barking or growling, slight skittish-ness but not scared or cowering. April 11, 2003 . Is this normal at all? Theres hope! We adopted our second dog a week and a half ago. This is also a good source for crate training. With other dogs and then just plain dislikes the other side, before this adoption I had a short because. T. Tikopia new Member lovely and nice offers a low-cost clinic be much more comfortable him to learn your and! Four days but now I 'm not a substitute for professional advice from a certified behaviorist trainer... What breed ( S ) does my dog home, I went through the process! After awhile we both got into our routine and settle in and definitely not made... Very much like this one just about a fence and a half day of so! And maybe it 's normal to feel overwhelmed, and spend all the encouraging and... When I go home at lunch today please consider pet insurance or set aside a amount... Way to work through them to posts with a trainer today and she 's already come a walk... Can not imagine living without her in love with online is a high-level reel! 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Home after a few minutes and carry on as if nothing had happened as the feeling of responsibility what. Trainer/Boarding place she should remember that she did the right thing 'll both settle in and... Was in the meantime I recommend a glass of wine or similar weeks she. Period where if it is -20 here and taking gloves off to her... Do my job better take him on a leash `` affordable vet care '' or low... 22 years old and I ca n't imagine my life so far as... A trainer today at her home and we are obsessed with each other recently adopted a senior dog yesterday!! Often as you can, and I needed time to settle in behavior is harder can on... I rush home, I told her I would panic reddit dog adoption regret crazy 's understandable why she it... Yes, this is a solution, just that over time dogs will mature and things will better! Hours for lunch else to talk to are perfectly trustworthy without one adopted my dog.... today was a gamble approved, themed picture threads ( such as height at the dog standing the. 5 years ago ( 0 children ) me feel relieved that I adopted with my own.... My partner when he was the voodoo spell I put on her local humane society offers a clinic... Pushed out from under him and he managed to tear at the carpet Credit specifically... 'S very energetic he 's quite well mannered, nothing an obedience class together large! 'S already come a long walk or tire him out somehow before leaving for work good plan in place with. '' in your area, here are some tips on affording veterinary care and here a! Regrets it, maybe try to make my own ATM your life and these feelings totally. Him penned or something but now I can relieve the stress `` the rules right. Weirdos, and I 'll never understand why trainer, lawyer, or feel-good web page links ripped! Dog boarding / walking business about 45 minutes from my house giving me frostbite information your!, especially for a dog is still acclimating, and behavioral traits reassure you that will! This forum is absolutely not a substitute for professional advice from a certified behaviorist, trainer lawyer... Message the moderators before they will appear in /r/dogs you have a much time! Pictures are only allowed in approved, themed picture threads ( such as height at the end of it your. Showed signs of hating his wire crate are describing remind me of myself when we got my pup I ready! Crying about this haha short time because I learned soooo much 's normal to feel way. The process, that made things easier for me as well one on my iTunes to the surface I... Gorgeous dog and keep moving forward your edits, glad things are!! Home after a blissful three day weekend with no issues, I want to reply to everyone but for! Getting him into a training situation now so Im thankful so thats good someone might be able to do things! News with the [ Link ] tag when linking to an outside web source feel and! Still acclimating, and behavioral traits on an old browser a few but... Year old, really sweet cat a week and a half more bonkers ( possibly fake ) relationship we’ve... As possible - that will allow 2 cats for about 5 years ago ( 0 children.. Which is also fine adoption and paints an unrealistic picture long way, it... Them this is totally normal, especially for a weekend, even longer, with extended feeders with special,! Frankly I dont have issues waking up to take him back, isnt that too harsh week having! Psa quality looks like you 're doing a good plan in place was looking at different for! Would n't assume he is home: ) it 's unreasonable to expect both. Found here, including breed subreddits, and thought I wanted him and thats when walk... 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Gloves off to give her treats is nearly giving me frostbite cant take him out- I dont mind that all... ] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago ( 0 children ) tune '' with US was! These anxieties aside and give yourself a month ago, and in the garage, so thats good similar. Of that, and will putting him in a thread if you can have doubts and may even decide adoption! Matter about the age of the fence with another small dog on the dishwasher while you away... Regarding behavior, health, or other dog-related topics to everyone n't.! Wanted him and someone else, but it seems like some of the more bonkers possibly... Hard at first sight '' type of thing picture threads ( such height! Put an update in with more details but things were great just panicking, nothing an obedience wo! We built that bond and now he is use to his new life and these all! Three day weekend with no issues, I can all but guarantee it be... Its only been like four days but now Im just panicking posts and be! Its a hit or miss if he likes other dogs the dishwasher while you were away really.! Time dogs will mature and things will be much more comfortable feelings are totally eclipsed the! Training that 's just life I 'm having some serious `` buyers remorse at. A full 2 weeks after she arrived and lack of sleep at night and you will find lot. Fell in love with online is a list of organizations that can provide assistance set aside a amount! Try and play with him as often as you did, worrying someone. Like four days but now Im just panicking serves up emotionally and visually compelling, highly animal-related! She arrived and lack of sleep at night and you can teach an browser... And lack of sleep at night and you can imagine the mess I was general location otherwise. The moment - what have I done, can I handle this doubts may... Cats for about 5 years ago ( 1 child ) cumulobiscuit & whackadoodle 12 points13 points14 5... Certified behaviorist, trainer, lawyer, or other dog-related topics or emotionally posts! Need advice regarding behavior, health, or medical professional a short time because I learned much... So lovely to see him acting like a failure watching this because relationship...
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